The Ideal Life Begins with the Ideal Day

“Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.” — Mahatma Gandhi

My Ideal Day (At Present Moment) includes the following

  • 8-9 hours of uninterrupted sleep
  • (At least) 1 hour of going outside the house
  • 1 hour of spending time helping my loved ones / household chores
  • 1-2 hours of engaged learning/building a skill/working on commitments
  • 30 minutes of exercise
  • 3 hours of my own time to do whatever I want / chill out & unwind

That leaves me with a good number of hours to do everything else (eat, bathe, travel, spontaneous things….)

“In fact, research shows that when our goals are specific (day to day), intrinsically motivating (things we care about), and time-bound (on a deadline), we’re more likely to keep going until we succeed.”

Learning to Look Fear Straight in the Face

luciana-urtiga_02.jpg© Luciana Urtiga

“You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, ‘I have lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.’ You must do the thing you think you cannot do.”Eleanor Roosevelt

For much of my life, I have not been very authentic with myself. And I think that because of this, I have missed out on many valuable learning points from the obstacles I have encountered along the journey that is life.

Every time I began to feel fear – be it stepping into the unknown, making a big decision that will affect how my life ahead proceeds, or things that go beyond the boundaries of my comfort zone – I simply tiptoed around Fear’s perimeters, without feeling the full extent of the dreaded emotion frankly nobody likes to feel (or talk about).

But it is necessary to stare fear in the face, and truly experience it fully. It is only then that you begin to identify what exactly it is that scares you – fear of rejection? Of not being good enough? Of things not going as planned? What is it that you are afraid of? Take the time to really think about this while feeling the full extent of fear. Being able to identify what it is that truly scares you (beyond the surface things that you think you are afraid of) and then acknowledging and admitting it to yourself is the first step to being authentic with yourself. It is the first step to learning all about your experiential self rather than letting your conceptual self (which is a natural manifestation of the ego) take the reins. In other words, being authentic with yourself strives to resolve the disconnection between your two selves, as well as keep a balance between the two.

Another important thing to realise is that fear is normal. It is something that occurs in every one of us. But it is up to us to not let fear define our choices and to not let fear take control over you. Repeat to yourself: Feel the fear, but do it anyway.

Remember:

“Every time we choose safety, we reinforce fear.” Cheri Huber

One thing that many people are afraid of is of not being good enough. To combat that fear, several practicalities can be conducted, one of which is to prepare yourself. You have a presentation coming up and you’re afraid of not being good enough? Practice, practice, practice. Are you about to go into something you fear you may not have the skills in? Strive to learn as much as you can about it. Cover your grounds. The worst thing you can do is become paralysed with fear. Bit by bit, build your way up (and out of the labyrinth of fear).